Flying Pumpkin Bars!

If you like all things pumpkin, I'm about to blow your mind. These things are good. I mean real good. I may substitute them for birthday cake next week. My grandma makes them by request-- usually mine (see description line in the picture of my family cookbook below). And speaking of my grandma, it was her birthday yesterday! I wish I had this post up a day earlier, but life happens. So HAPPY BIRTHDAY GMA!!

I decided to share the wealth and make them for a Halloween potluck at work and, luckily, I set a few aside for myself because they were gone.

The frosting is made using what I suspect is my family's favorite ingredient: butter. I made Thanksgiving dinner myself for the first time last year and used almost a box of butter. And it was delicious. As for the frosting, butter + cream cheese + powdered sugar = butter cream frosting. This is why math is so important, people.

I also learned a very valuable lesson in shooting the bars: Do not use a three year old as a hand model because they may accidentally throw your plate of food over their head. They are not terribly coordinated-- true story. See below.

Life After School

Hello there! I know I fell off the blog world for a minute again, but instead of dousing you with excuses let me talk about what's been on my mind.

I have been thinking a lot about monotony recently. Driving to the same place, sitting in the same chair and doing virtually the same thing every day before making the same drive home. I have been out of school and working full time for a year now and it feels...well, weird. For as long as I can remember I have said I'm not the kind of person to work a desk job, yet I have been sitting day in and day out and survived the monotony thus far.

One day during my commute, a.k.a. my least favorite part of the day, when I was trying to think of the advantages (besides fiscal reasons) of doing something you feel "meh" about all day five days a week, it occurred to me that some people may enjoy their monotonous jobs because they can be on autopilot while they make money and then do what interests them outside of work. It's not invalid, but I can't help but feel that my time outside of work is very limited and also goes by much, much faster the second I hit the "clock out" button.

Growing up, I remember family, teachers and other optimistic adults would always say "You can be anything you want to be."  I believed them, within reason, as I went through stages of wanting to be a veterinarian, a lawyer, a psychologist and a fashion designer. But coming out of school and into a world where you are lucky to have a job-- period-- and so many qualified people are out of work, it doesn't seem the case. I know "You can be anything you want to be...unless there is a huge economic downturn, in which case you should be anything you can find" is not an idyllic way to raise children, but perhaps it would yield a generation less emotionally attached to their occupation. The downside to "You can be anything" is that if you don't end up doing that thing you told everyone you wanted to do then what are you doing? Settling?

Here's where it gets sticky: I am very attached to the idea of being able to use my creativity in a career. I want to do new things, learn new things and see new things. Ever since my mom died I feel the fragility of life in a much more tangible way. It really, really is too short. For some much shorter than others. I don't want to waste time by not enjoying the present moment and I don't want to regret taking the safe route. I just don't want to be a robot; don't we have robots for that?

Happy Birthday, mom and thank you for everything. Thank you for always encouraging me to express myself from letting me dress myself for school when Punky Brewest was my style icon to always having paint and canvas in the house. Thank you for telling me I can be whatever I want to be.

Skillet Cookie

It's Thursday, which mean it's almost Friday! Here are some pictures of my execution on Heidi's whole wheat chocolate chip skillet cookie. After yet another successful recipe from her blog I trust her taste more than ever. Some healthy recipes fall short on satisfaction but hers don't suffer that downfall. I will say this is a very heavy dessert. You don't need that much, the whole wheat flour makes for a much more filling cookie. We ate it over a couple days chunk by chunk. I bought ice cream to go with it, but actually preferred the cookie on its own.

I had two Lindt dark chocolate bars left over from making Christmas cookies last year (!) and finally remembered to use them. The recipe calls for bittersweet, but I wanted to get these bars off my hands. Really, you could use whatever you prefer and I'm sure it will be good.

Here's a look at the crusty edge, it wasn't much of a looker as a whole but I think the edges tell you what you need to know.

Broccoli Cheddar Soup's Big Sister

Hello, Tuesday. I feel like you snuck up on me prematurely as it was still dark when my alarm went off, which did not help the daily denial period I snooze through convincing myself ten more minutes is all I need. Can't wait to fall back so I have a little more light to get me going in the morning. Here are some pictures I took while making Heidi's Broccoli Cheddar Soup with mustard croutons when I was home sick the weekend before last. I left work early on Friday and was in bed all weekend and by Sunday I couldn't take it anymore--I had to do something productive. Being sick, I was in a soup mood and craving something homey and comforting. 

I went to store to get the ingredients but, disappointingly, they did not have creme fraiche. I was too tired to think much about it so I got everything else and moved on. As it turns out, I did not miss it. This soup is very filling and flavorful and with the aged cheddar it doesn't really need cream. And the mustardy croutons are seriously tasty. I never would have thought to flavor croutons with mustard, but if you're not a soup person, top a salad with some of  these suckers and you won't look back. Pinky promise. I will probably make these again next time I have left over bread from a loaf, I even bought a new jar of whole grain mustard at the grocery store yesterday. I'm that serious.

Purple Pancackes

I made these pancakes one morning after I woke up wondering how to use up some blueberries and blackberries that were about to over-ripen. I went a little crazy at the grocery store and ended up with much more than we eat in a week so I had about a cup of blueberries and a generous half cup of blackberries.

You know what I wonder: Why did neither of these berries end up being called "purple berries" when they both bleed purple? Blueberries, you pass because you are at least blue on the outside. But blackberries, what's up with that?!

I started by mashing the blackberries with a masher thing (I'm a professional, you know) and then put together the pancake mix according to an old soiled-but-loved copy of Better Homes "New Cook Book." I followed the whole wheat version, because whole wheat totally cancels out syrup. That's a fact. After the batter was prepared I folded in the mushed blackberries and then tossed in the blueberries. And I must say, it looked like go-gurt-- probably edible, possibly radioactive. It was the sickly artificial kind of color kids go nuts for these days. Luckily, cooking made them much more attractive. And edible, which is also important.

Is it Friday yet?

Hello! I had not realized quite how long it had been since I blogged. As I shared before, I had a big job and it was taking up the better part of my mind/worries (well, it still is). After the job, which was the Sunday before last, I was feeling exhausted and decided to lay off blogging for a week to recoup. Well, that sort of bled into this week and I realized it's almost pay day and I have yet to blog or create anything! Perhaps it's stress or the early disappearance of the sun, but I have been much more inclined to curl up on the couch with a blanket rather than spend additional time at the computer. I could also blame all the new fall shows, but I won't be petty.

I know it happens basically the same way every year, but every time fall rears its head I swear it's not due. I have not had enough sunshine, swimming or warm nights. I have not had the perfect nectarine. It's just not right. Well, I declare it's time to embrace what fall has to offer rather than blame it for ruining my beloved summer. Plus, fall means my birthday is right around the corner and who doesn't love celebrating numero uno?  I already decided where I will have my official birthday dinner. Today's first picture is actually the ceiling of the restaurant from my first visit in August. It was obviously delicious because I decided far in advance that it will be the first stop of the train that will be my birthday weekend (insert train sound here!) And here's a picture I just came across while organizing, just to make things even.

Taking Heed

"Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through." -Ira Glass

Just ran into a quote that I bookmarked a few months ago after I saw it posted on mint. I'm really glad I make a habit of savings quotes because, yet again, this quote has taken the edge off. I generally don't re-post things that I have seen on other blogs, but this concept really hit a chord with me today and I wanted to share. I was just thinking I wish I had something ready to post and when I saw this I thought why not pass along an inspiring quote with a photo--okay, an older photo that I happen to have access to via flickr. Oh, well.

I have some photos to work on to share and very little time to edit them as I have a crazy busy week ending with my first big photography job on Sunday! I feel like this week is going to fly right by.